October 30, 2014

Sometimes my husband is my biggest enemy...

Yesterday morning I caught my youngest daughter eating Halloween candy at 8:30 in the morning.
Me to Little R: Why are you eating Candy?
Lilttle R: Daddy gave it to me
Me to Mr. R: Why did you give her candy in the morning?
Mr. R: She finished her breakfast
Me: Eating breakfast does not earn dessert.  Especially when breakfast is a frosting covered pastry in the form of a pop tart
Mr. R: (shrug)

10 Minutes ago, Mr. R and Big R counted all the change in her pickle jar:
Little R: Mom! I have $31!
Me to Mr. R: Have you been putting money in her change jar again?! We have a change jar for vacations. Extra change is supposed to go in there to be spent on the family.  Big R should be getting change for doing chores which she hasn't been doing.
Mr. R: oh-kay.  I'll quit putting money in her change jar
(Yeah, I've heard that about 10 times now.)

Seriously, it makes it so hard to teach our kids to eat good and to learn they need to earn money for the things they want to buy when I have a husband that loves to indulge them and doesn't understand, no matter how many conversations we've had, that it is important for our girls to be taught these things!

Ugh! I need a glass of wine!


  1. who in their right mind would want a parent such as yourself? know what your teaching your child? that you, as a mother are selfish, horrible and cheap. what is so wrong with a dad slipping his daughter something special. when he is dead, what do you think your daughter will remember of him? how economically frugal he was? or how kind he was and generous he was to give her something special and unique? loosen up lady. it's halloween. ALL kids indulge in a bit of candy. does hubby give her candy each and every day? of course not. and dad slips a few coins into her jar? yeah, so what? by your anger, you're just teaching your daughters that you are petty and cheap.
    oh, and it's 'teach our kids to eat WELL'. your sentence is grammatically incorrect.
    Your husband LOVES to indulge HIS children. That's his right. That's what dads do. That's what your children will remember. Your kids will have plenty of time to learn about making a salary. On their own!

    1. Wow! I never had a hateful comment before. I guess there's a first for everything.

      First of all this is MY blog so I will write what I want how I want. If you're so worried about grammar why don't you re-read your comment and fix some of your mistakes. And then quit reading this blog if you are so offended by my posts that you feel the need to be negative and rude.

      Since you don't know me or my husband your comment was rather ignorant. The candy argument is a very common occurrence. He does, in fact, slip her candy before dinner almost every day. Multiple desserts in the evenings and the dessert after breakfast both happen a lot. And the "few coins in the jar"? It wasn't a few. It was about $30 worth in the last couple months even though just last week we had a conversation about Big R needing to do her chores and then he has done them for her every single day since then. So my daughter isn't learning to be petty and cheap, she's learning that daddy will give her pretty much anything she wants without having to even ask for it let alone earn it.

      Even though I wrote this post as if I'm complaining, I really didn't mean it to be taken in such a negative way. I'm just pointing out the discussions that we seem to have over and over. I think you took way more offense to this than you should have. Even my husband read it and didn't think anything of it.

      So again... Go away. You sound like an angry, bitter person and I don't want someone like that reading my blog anyways.

    2. I wouldn't worry about the negative posters.

  2. It can be tough when parents don't agree on certain things that pertain with children, but I guess compromise is the best way to go. I see that a lot with my sister and brother in law.

  3. Oh wow to that above comment. I'm sorry you had to experience that nonsense!
    I completely understand how you were writing this and I completely understand what you're saying.
    This parenting thing sure is a journey isn't it :) And even now with my two year old I'm fascinated at the reality of how these tiny daily lessons are shaping him and teaching him to be responsible for he has to be. Exactly like your "earning change for chores" and "having candy before dinner" argument. There are big lessons to be learned there. Sounds like hubby wants to be the cool dad :) Mine's like that too.

    1. Just to clarify, I meant to say "for when he has to be," not "for he has to be." I don't hold my two year old to high responsibility standards right now. But when he's grown...

  4. That comment was totally uncalled for. I truly enjoy reading your blog but I do think at times you could "loosen up" just a smidge in regards to money lessons, etc. It's not a bad thing at all what you are trying to teach your girls but you yourself only put in like $20 a month into their savings accounts for I assume college/their future while dropping money on Mall Madness, frequent vacations , etc. But then get upset at your husband for wanting to treat them. He has his way of treating and you have yours. I agree that too much candy is not a good thing especially for their teeth/health so I would probably get on him about that too. I'm sure you two can come to a middle ground about this. My husband gets upset sometimes because he feels I'm always the one bringing home "treats" for our daughter. I do the budget and handle the finances so I know when there is extra money for those things and I need to make sure to let him be the treat bearer too. You probably got the credit for the Mall Madness game and more things that you dont even realize so he just wants his credit too.